Comments on: Dreams of Home http://www.bingregory.com/archives/2009/05/21-dreams-of-home/ Official Organ of an American Muslim in Malaysia Mon, 30 Jan 2012 14:30:56 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 By: Aishah http://www.bingregory.com/archives/2009/05/21-dreams-of-home/comment-page-1/#comment-63581 Aishah Sat, 13 Mar 2010 12:56:02 +0000 http://www.bingregory.com/archives/2009/05/21-dreams-of-home/#comment-63581 Asalaamu Alaikum Ok so I finally read the joke..so true. Before I came to Malaysia I talked to a lot of people who had visited Malaysia as tourists and they had such glowing reports. No wonder they travel there as if they are still back home..5 star hotels etc. Also never ask a native either...they only have glowing reports too. So this is how I was hoodwinked! Asalaamu Alaikum

Ok so I finally read the joke..so true. Before I came to Malaysia I talked to a lot of people who had visited Malaysia as tourists and they had such glowing reports. No wonder they travel there as if they are still back home..5 star hotels etc. Also never ask a native either…they only have glowing reports too. So this is how I was hoodwinked!

]]> By: bingregory http://www.bingregory.com/archives/2009/05/21-dreams-of-home/comment-page-1/#comment-63565 bingregory Fri, 12 Mar 2010 08:08:50 +0000 http://www.bingregory.com/archives/2009/05/21-dreams-of-home/#comment-63565 Must be a different lady. The one I know is pretty pro Malaysia - they're planning to move back once they save up enough. Might never happen of course, but you know. Anyway this is getting pretty personal so I'm going to carry on by email tonight inshallah if you don't mind. Must be a different lady. The one I know is pretty pro Malaysia – they’re planning to move back once they save up enough. Might never happen of course, but you know. Anyway this is getting pretty personal so I’m going to carry on by email tonight inshallah if you don’t mind.

]]> By: Aishah http://www.bingregory.com/archives/2009/05/21-dreams-of-home/comment-page-1/#comment-63563 Aishah Fri, 12 Mar 2010 05:15:39 +0000 http://www.bingregory.com/archives/2009/05/21-dreams-of-home/#comment-63563 All of my kids have dual citizenship..it happens automatically when you are a guy..I know..so unfair..let's blame Mahathir..oh he's gone but anyway you kwim. Yeah that was the deal with hubby too...that we had to go back to Malaysia. I was ok with it because I went sight unseen and I had all kinds of hopes and dreams which never panned out. I wanted my kids to be able to speak malay too and get a religious education. They wouldn't enroll my son in islamic/arabic school though because he didn't know malay. My two daughters went to regular school but they had stupid things like playing the flute. Instead of arabic they had jawi. My hope was to get an Islamic loan since they have an islamic bank there to get a house but with such low wages I could see we would probably never have anything! The guy in Detroit? I think I know who you mean! I talked to them just before we left for Malaysia. His wife told me that she hated Malaysia. I was excited to go that I couldn't tolerate what she was saying. After I came back I totally understood! I don't live in Windsor but about an hour from there. If I crossed the border I would land in Algonac not Detroit. I have never crossed the border though since '99. I'm too terrified! Oh I lost her contact info. Can you give it to me again? You like living there but isn't there things you don't like? How did you adapt? Did her family accept you? My in-laws didn't even want my husband to marry me. It was really awful and my parents flipped out too. No blessings from anyone. All of my kids have dual citizenship..it happens automatically when you are a guy..I know..so unfair..let’s blame Mahathir..oh he’s gone but anyway you kwim. Yeah that was the deal with hubby too…that we had to go back to Malaysia. I was ok with it because I went sight unseen and I had all kinds of hopes and dreams which never panned out. I wanted my kids to be able to speak malay too and get a religious education. They wouldn’t enroll my son in islamic/arabic school though because he didn’t know malay. My two daughters went to regular school but they had stupid things like playing the flute. Instead of arabic they had jawi. My hope was to get an Islamic loan since they have an islamic bank there to get a house but with such low wages I could see we would probably never have anything! The guy in Detroit? I think I know who you mean! I talked to them just before we left for Malaysia. His wife told me that she hated Malaysia. I was excited to go that I couldn’t tolerate what she was saying. After I came back I totally understood! I don’t live in Windsor but about an hour from there. If I crossed the border I would land in Algonac not Detroit. I have never crossed the border though since ’99. I’m too terrified! Oh I lost her contact info. Can you give it to me again?

You like living there but isn’t there things you don’t like? How did you adapt? Did her family accept you? My in-laws didn’t even want my husband to marry me. It was really awful and my parents flipped out too. No blessings from anyone.

]]> By: bingregory http://www.bingregory.com/archives/2009/05/21-dreams-of-home/comment-page-1/#comment-63562 bingregory Fri, 12 Mar 2010 04:20:50 +0000 http://www.bingregory.com/archives/2009/05/21-dreams-of-home/#comment-63562 Oh some of your kids are registered in Malaysia? That's good. All my children were born in Malaysia - it was the only way for them to get Malaysian citizenship. With the first two, we were still living in the US, in school and later working. She would fly back shortly before term, deliver, recuperate and fly back. We moved there when she was heavily pregnant with the third. We had already decided to move back to Malaysia basically before we got married. Yeah, she had a loan to repay, but also it was a strategic move, and a hijrah. I wanted my kids to be bilingual and to have a religious education. I didn't know for sure if it would be permanent. I still don't, though it increasingly looks that way, and I'm happy here. In the end I think immigration is really something you do for your kids - most immigrants - from anywhere to anywhere - have an ambivalence about their adopted country and the choice they've made somewhere inside. Leaving their family if nothing else. Have you heard the joke about <a href="http://www.bingregory.com/archives/2002/10/29-boris-speaks/" rel="nofollow">the guy who visits hell?</a> Are you in Windsor proper? I know a family in the Detroit area - Malaysian guy, American girl, 5 kids. I could put you in touch. Still far though, I know. Oh some of your kids are registered in Malaysia? That’s good. All my children were born in Malaysia – it was the only way for them to get Malaysian citizenship. With the first two, we were still living in the US, in school and later working. She would fly back shortly before term, deliver, recuperate and fly back. We moved there when she was heavily pregnant with the third. We had already decided to move back to Malaysia basically before we got married. Yeah, she had a loan to repay, but also it was a strategic move, and a hijrah. I wanted my kids to be bilingual and to have a religious education. I didn’t know for sure if it would be permanent. I still don’t, though it increasingly looks that way, and I’m happy here. In the end I think immigration is really something you do for your kids – most immigrants – from anywhere to anywhere – have an ambivalence about their adopted country and the choice they’ve made somewhere inside. Leaving their family if nothing else. Have you heard the joke about the guy who visits hell? Are you in Windsor proper? I know a family in the Detroit area – Malaysian guy, American girl, 5 kids. I could put you in touch. Still far though, I know.

]]> By: Aishah http://www.bingregory.com/archives/2009/05/21-dreams-of-home/comment-page-1/#comment-63560 Aishah Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:37:04 +0000 http://www.bingregory.com/archives/2009/05/21-dreams-of-home/#comment-63560 I've never visited again..can't afford it. Dh has gone back 3 times since we came back; twice with one kid at a time and once alone. He brought them because they had to get their IC card. We went there when we had 6 kids and left with 6 kids and the 7th on the way! We can't afford to go back and what would we go back to? I've never had twins. Tickets for all of us would be like $20,000 Canadian. When you went there did you have kids yet? Was your wife a sponsored student too? Would you like to come back to the US? The year after I came back 911 happened and I was kicking myself thinking I should have stayed in Malaysia because I suffered so much because of it living on the border with the US. If both of you are working, who watches the kids? Some people have told my husband to get a job with the oil industry..they apparently pay big bucks and we could live decently on it but he never got any leads from them. I don't know where I belong. I don't feel really happy in either place. Here in Canada there are mostly Pakistanis and Arabs and they don't really accept us. The nearest malays are hours away! What made you leave? Was it a hijra for you too? Or you wife had to go back to pay the loan? I’ve never visited again..can’t afford it. Dh has gone back 3 times since we came back; twice with one kid at a time and once alone. He brought them because they had to get their IC card. We went there when we had 6 kids and left with 6 kids and the 7th on the way! We can’t afford to go back and what would we go back to? I’ve never had twins. Tickets for all of us would be like $20,000 Canadian. When you went there did you have kids yet? Was your wife a sponsored student too? Would you like to come back to the US? The year after I came back 911 happened and I was kicking myself thinking I should have stayed in Malaysia because I suffered so much because of it living on the border with the US. If both of you are working, who watches the kids? Some people have told my husband to get a job with the oil industry..they apparently pay big bucks and we could live decently on it but he never got any leads from them. I don’t know where I belong. I don’t feel really happy in either place. Here in Canada there are mostly Pakistanis and Arabs and they don’t really accept us. The nearest malays are hours away! What made you leave? Was it a hijra for you too? Or you wife had to go back to pay the loan?

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